From 1974-1981, I delivered approximately 30 speeches in front of audiences, not including the ones that I gave as a student. I began speaking on a regular basis in 1982 and probably delivered over eighty speeches during the first 11 or 12 months. During the time period from 1974-1982, I received a lot of praise and only rarely any criticism. (Actually from 1974-1976, I did receive some criticism from family members.)

When I got married in 1983, I explained to my wife that the lack of criticism which I had been receiving made it impossible for me to evaluate the effectiveness of my presentations and of my effort to communicate. I asked my wife to keep track of all my speeches to evaluate both the content and the delivery and to write extended comments.

Her assistance in this effort has been invaluable to my development as a speaker. Praise may make you feel good but it does not help you to learn and to adjust.

Dan Russell wrote an article on Kathy Sierra's blog, Creating Passionate Users, last September entitled: "Screaming Users considered Good."

Labels: Evaluation

Are you more into condemnation or deliverance?

Many people who wish to be optimistic, visionary leaders destroy their effectiveness as leaders by an attitude which sounds good but is actually destructive. They decide that they will not tolerate anyone who tends to be negative to associate with them.

An effective leader will try to deliver the defeatist from their own self-destructive behavior. Reg Adkins wrote an article entitled: "In 6 Steps Whiners Become Winners."

Labels: Leadership

Recently Seth Godin has stirred up a lot of discussion on the topic of whether or not, Winners ever Quit.

Last September, Dr, Jeffrey Cornwall wrote an article about an athlete who kept going after he should have quit. The article asks the single word question: Courage?

Labels: Evaluation

Is respecting other people's confidential information, keeping your appointments, fulfilling your contracts and completing similar tasks all there is to trustworthiness? Or is there a deeper internal transformation which is a pre-requisite to trustworthiness?

Lisa Haneberg provides a quote from four decades ago in her article "Carl Rogers on Authenticity"

Labels: Becoming, Transformation, Trust

As a Leader have you ever felt that someone within your sphere of responsibility had a lot of potential if only they could discover their niche in life.

Sometimes instead of waiting for another person to discover their "genius," a leader should exercise a little brainpower of his or her own and see if they can suggest an area in which the other person might seek their "genius."

Employers and Managers sometimes have an employee who is a great worker but has not found his niche. Skip Angel wrote an article some time ago entitled "Finding the Sweet Spot In Others."

Labels: Leadership, Mentoring

The vision of an effective leader needs to communicate the potential for a bright future. However, in order for that vision to be realistic, there must first be a honest and unbiased assessment of the present.

Just as the planning of a road trip requires that the planned route begin at the location where the trip will begin, so also leadership must begin at the place where the leading will commence.

Some people view the honest assessment of the status quo as an exercise in pessimism, but a denial of the present means that the vision for the future is nothing but a fantasy.

This 1999 article from Fast Company by Ronald Heifetz is today's recommended reading

In the post before last I wrote about those who are motivated by a desire to avoid failure and recommended an article by Simon Young.

The opposite of those who are motivated by a desire to avoid, are those who are motivated by a desire to succeed. The Cowardly Lion sings that the difference between a slave and a king is simply: Courage!

You can not be "King of the Forest" unless you have the courage to step forward when the fearful step back. Lisa Haneburg wrote an article entitled "Are We Brave Enough," which is today's recommended reading.

Labels: Courage, Leadership

Do you always give other people's ideas "a fair hearing?"

There are some people who seem to think that whenever a proposal is made, that the best thing to do is to offer a verdict or to immediately offer an opposing or balancing viewpoint.

Such an attitude tends to be prejudicial.

A good leader allows the person who makes a proposal time to make their case and then attempts to determine whether or not he has properly understood the case before attempting to engage in an evaluation of the proposal.

Today's recommended reading is an article by Kris Bordessa entitled "Banishing Negativity."

Labels: Leadership

Seeking to avoid failure is not the key to succeeding. Seeking to avoid failure is the key to mediocrity.

Only those who strive to succeed attain to consistent achievement. Those who seek to avoid failure are like the student who strives to pass a course with a grade above failure but who is not striving for excellence or like the money steward whose master was angry because instead of investing the money, the servant buried the money and returned to the master exactly what he had been given.

Today's recommended reading is an article by Simon Young entitled "The Gulf between Succeeding and 'Not Failing.'"

Imagine this scenario: A sixteen year old gets behind the wheel of a Driver's Training Car. When he gets to the intersection, he tries to turn the steering wheel to the right but the steering wheel won't budge, and then suddenly the steering wheel starts turning under his hands but will not allow him to turn too quickly or too slowly.

Is that the perfect Driver's Training Car? No. You can not learn to drive in a car which will not allow you to make mistakes.

Sometimes young parents and recently promoted managers make the mistake of acting just like the imaginary Driver's Training Car described above. They think that preventing any mistakes from ever occurring is the right way to be a parent or a boss.

But experienced leaders know better than this. No one can learn unless they are given the opportunity to experience responsibility.

Today's recommended reading is an older article by Skip Angel entitled "Making Mistakes."

Labels: Leadership

Children are always trying to dodge responsibility for past actions. Either they deny involvement or they blame someone else.

Those who are somewhat more mature accept acknowledge things which they have done.

But adults shoulder responsibility for things which have been done by those for whom they are responsible. A parent will shoulder the blame for something which his five year old has done. A general may shoulder the blame for something his troops have done. A business owner may shoulder the blame for something which his employees have done.

Today's recommend reading is "A Major Obstacle to Growing as a Leader: Blaming Others" by Dr. Paul White

Humans are not always analytical. We are sometimes emotional. If you have ever made the mistake of trying to use logic to "solve" another person's emotional crisis, you may have caused more damage than good.

Other people are not the only ones who are subject to emotional crisis. You are, also. Sometimes your gut (emotions) and your logic (rationality) do not always agree. How can we resolve our own personal emotional crisis and get on with life.

Today's recommended reading is an article by Scott Young entitled "Overcoming Discouragement."

Labels: Scripting

Imagine yourself in the depths of a forest on a moonless night. Ahead through the trees, you glimpse the light of nearby village. Let us call this village, the village of possibility. All around you, in every other direction, is darkness. Now you have a choice to make. You can either focus your attention on the darkness and complain about the absence of lights in those directions which are dark or you can choose to be grateful for the light which comes from the village of possibility.

Those who focus their minds on complaining, rarely see possibility. Gratitude for the existence of possibility is a key factor in achieving the possible.

Read more in todays recommended reading: "The Power of Gratitude and Anticipation" by Terry Paulsen.

Labels: Attitude

As our society continues to move away from analog audio/visual recordings to digital/optical recordings fewer and fewer people have seen a reel-to-reel machine. Movie Projectors and Tape Recorders, formerly, possessed a feed reel and a take-up reel. As the amount of film or tape decreased on the feed reel, it would increase on the take up reel. If the machine was set to rewind, the process of decreasing the amount on one reel while increasing the amount on the other would reverse.

These two reels may metaphorically be assigned to Self-obsession and to Concern for Others. A person who is truly concerned for the well-being of others must decrease his or her self-pity, selfish ambition and self-indulgence.

Today's recommended reading is: "Humility: The Core of Servant Leadership" by Harry Joiner.

Labels: Becoming